Svadhyaya (Study of the Self Realizatio​n)

17 11 2011

I met a friend (ex-coworker) for lunch today. We have not seen each other since I resigned from my “job” 2 months earlier. We ate, we brought each other up-to-date on our families, and then the conversation landed on the latest situation at the “job”. I put “job” in ” ” because that is what it was to me, a paycheck.

I knew when I took the job, 3 years earlier, it was a mistake. I could feel it in my gut, after I had accepted the position. Looking back I could see the signs. Everyone kept telling me it was a great move. And I listened, thinking they knew what was best for me, more than I knew myself! Sad thing is, I didn’t think I had a choice.

I was miserable. I think I may have even been depressed. I didn’t see a way out. I felt stuck, boxed in. I did my best to suck it up and just accept the fact that this was how it had to be. I consistently looked for other jobs, applied, interviewed, but nothing happened.

Then I decided to make an appointment with a life coach.  I don’t know what I expected from her, but she helped me see my situation outside the box. I started meditating, journaling, seeking for answers. And something clicked. Somewhere, I came up with the idea that I wanted to become a personal trainer! I took a course, joined La Bella Viaggio, and hired a personal trainer/mentor. I developed a plan and worked it.  Me! I do not have an athletic bone in my body. I’m not competitive. Never played sports. But something inside me told me this was right. So, after a year and a half, I passed the test and landed a job at La Bella Viaggio! Since then, I have become a yoga instructor and I am working towards my 200 hour certification.

Two months ago I had the opportunity to turn my new found passion into a ful-time passion. I could not have done it without the love of my husband, John. He has tolerated lousy meals, my odd hours, a not-so-clean home, and a tired wife. Self-doubt crept in many times, but John consistently knew what to say to lift me up and get back on track. He never disappointed me. 

What a turn my life has taken. I never knew a job could be so fulfilling. Everyday my clients give me the opportunity to guide them towards their goals and share my passion. They don’t realize they give me so much in return. I leave the gym feeling fulfilled, energized, and thankful.

Lunch with my friend acknowledged that my leap of faith to follow my passion, at 50+ years old, was clearly what was best for me. I have not looked back, nor questioned my choice. I knew in my gut. I listened this time.

Would it be too far fetched for me to believe that I am beginning to practice yoga off the mat? Is this a study of the self?

Has yoga transformed your thoughts, actions, and beliefs?

Namaste

Tammy